


Crash & Burn

by Deidubabo



Category: GOT7
Genre: Age Difference, F/M, Gen, M/M, Mentioned Other K-pop Artist(s), Multi, Platonic Female/Male Relationships, Platonic Male/Male Relationships, Slow Burn
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-09-17
Updated: 2020-12-14
Packaged: 2021-03-08 01:07:32
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Underage
Chapters: 8
Words: 11,420
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26517193
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Deidubabo/pseuds/Deidubabo
Summary: Is there a happy end if you're catching feelings for one of your closest friend? Is there a chance of not getting hurt?~~You, a poison that spreads throughout my bodyI have no choiceFrom the beginning it was you for meEven though I know I will be hurt now I can’t stopAs time goes by thirst gets stronger constantlyEndlessly burning up fireThe future with you I’m not afraid of it one bitTill I crash & burnI constantly want youNo I won’t stopI’m dizzy dizzyYou in my head...
Relationships: Im Jaebum | JB/Mark Tuan
Comments: 4
Kudos: 11





	1. Prologue

The boy took a deep breath, closing his eyes in the process, trying to shut down his racing mind. But he couldn’t; all day, he kept thinking about how much he fucked up. The sun was shining brightly, but his soul swallowed up all the light, leaving him with dark thoughts and sateless anxiety. He glanced back at his abandoned notes, beating the devil’s tattoo, but still not focused on studying. He tried again, with his eyes closed, ready to breathe in, but he only sees his face now. His radiant smile, his disheveled brown hair, his pout, his _everything._

\- Why me – he mutters dejectedly, tearing his own hair. _Why the hell he had to fall in love? Why with him, out of all people?_

His family was something else to explain. He never minded most of it, though. When he was three, and his mother asked him, „ _Honey, want to take an adventure with me?”_ he nodded without a second thought. As it turned out, they just went to Ilsan, to his faternal grandparents’ home, but the boy loved every moment of it. You see, his grandparents were nothing like his father was. He wasn’t afraid of them. His mother didn’t cried after talking to them. And it was all he asked for, when he prayed at nights; _please, don’t let her cry anymore. Let her be happy._ He was only three, but he knew something was off with his father, with his relationship with his mother, his never ending absence to the point he thought he is just a man visiting them. Screaming at them sometimes, drinking soju all night, beat them at times. It was better if he was away. He was only three, but feared the sound of the front door opening.

After running away with his mother, he didn’t heard from his father ever again. His grandparents disowned him as soon as his mother left him for good, taking the two in instead of their own son.

Despite his early childhood, he turned out to be a reliable young adult. With his brothers, they were inseparable. Being best friends with them, and with another one; the brothers welcomed him in with hearts and arms open years ago, forming a group of four. Growing up together, sometimes going against the world, but never against one another. Joined by the hips, knowing there will be someone to catch them if they fall.

And now, he was falling really hard and fast, but there is no one to catch him. No one is waiting for him at the end of his painful path, and he can’t do anything but blame himself for this mess.


	2. Chapter One

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you'll enjoy! I will upload the tags as the story goes on, and I'm sorry, but I forgot to mention that there'll be short chapters at first, and I'm trying to write longer ones later. =)

A soft, melodic voice broke his inner turmoil. It was distant at first, so he ignored it, trying to remerge into his daydreams about _him_. Dreams about being happy together, being in each other’s arms, love each other without the harsh consequences.

\- Jaebeom hyung? You alright? – asked the voice, this time closer, so he had no choice but come back to earth from his Dreamland. – Beom hyung? – a warm hand makes his way from his shoulder to his hair, gently playing with his locks. Only one calls him that, and only one can touch him with such gentleness; the boy who winded him round his fingers.

\- I’m still alive. – he mutters out in a low voice, instinctively leaning closer to the boy. Jaebeom hugs him one-sidedly, burying his nose in the boy’s neck. The younger giggles but didn’t pushes him away. He keeps caressing Jaebeom’s hair, slowly lulling him to sleep. The boy’s scent whacked his senses, making his heart flutter alongside with the gentle strokes on his hair and arm. He just doesn’t want this moment to end, he tries to savor it for later as much as he can. But he can’t get enough of this pleasantly jittery feeling in his stomach, how his heart misses a beat every time the other does something as trivial as breathing.

\- Beom hyung, we should go home, don’t fall asleep here. – the boy says quietly, without the intent to get up from their spot.

\- But you’re comfortable and you will go home, too… - Jaebeom pouts, too tired to care, but the boy didn’t see it anyway, so who cares.

\- I won’t, I was on my way to yours when I saw you here.

\- Munchkin didn’t said you will come over. You’re just trying to trick me. – he huffs, tightening his hands around the younger. For that nickname, he would get a good amount of punches to his shoulder if he says it aloud in front of his youngest brother, but that Beating Monster isn’t here, so he just hopes that his best friend wouldn’t hit him on his behalf. Not that he would mind it, though, but that’s a thought for much calmer place, when he is on his own.

\- Nah, I’m not. My parents got in the first plane to Hong Kong at dawn, and I didn’t have the chance to call him since. – he says, one hand still in Jaebeom’s hair, the other one gripping his arms. – You know I don’t like to be at home alone.

\- You guys just came back from there. Like, two weeks ago. – And since then, I’m a mess, thank you very much.

\- I don’t care, at least I don’t have to go with them this time. – He giggles, and moves his hands away from Jaebeom, getting up from the bench. With a sigh, Jaebeom follows him, trying to fight his urge to hold the boy’s hand. – Oh, I bought you strawberry milk. – the younger said after a silent minute, rummaging through his backpack. Jaebeom never liked quiet companions, except studying together, because he was utterly uneasy in those situations, but he shared tons of silent yet serene moments with the boy next to him. _How in the hell he didn’t noticed it sooner?_

\- Oh, thanks. – Jaebeom was brought back to the present as the younger gave him a bottle of cold milk. – You just bought these, aren’t you? – he asked as he gulped down half of the drink.

\- Yeah, when I saw you, I decided it was better that way; if you became grumpy because I disturbed your nap, I appease you with your favorites. I also bought some spicy tteokbokki crackers, mochis and bungeoppang. – he showed his bag’s content briefly.

\- Oh, cut the crap, you just wanted to buy some snacks, we all know I can’t be mad at you. – Jaebeom said as he reached out to grab a snack.

\- Better safe than sorry, Beom Hyung. You never know. – The brunet smiles up at him, and for a moment, Jaebeom forgot how to breathe. All day he dreamed about being this close to the boy, seeing his smile, be able to talk to him carelessly, yet, in real life, it knocked the air out of him, so he hardly, but recollects himself with a weak smile on his face and takes out a snack randomly.

* * *

The first time he noticed that the younger can’t make him mad was years ago. Jaebeom was twelve, and he was only seven, as it was just weeks after they became friends. Regardless of how skillful the boy was with sports or anything he tried; he was extremely clumsy at times. They learned it in the hardest way. He was shy, quiet and became clumsy when he was super nervous. And he became edgy easily; if he had to talk, if he had to answer a question, if he had to ask or anything that included him speaking or doing something without his will. Meanwhile as, “please give me the black pencil”, or “Can you please tell me what time is it?”. So, nothing wrong or anything, just things he didn’t expected.

The first time he gave a reason to Jaebeom to be mad at him was at an uneventful afternoon when the four of them studied together in the brothers’ home. They occasionally helped each other out, and the boy being the genius he is, helped the older two out too. So, they worked mostly in silence, when Jaebeom noticed his strawberry milk was set aside, and the younger was closest to it. Jaebeom, being the lazy kid he is, asked him to hand it to him, so the boy reached for the glass full of strawberry milk, and as he grasped it, tried to reach over with a little too much enthusiasm; he swung his arms too much, covering Jaebeom with strawberry milk from head to toe.

\- I-I’m so-sor-sorry, Jae-Jaebeom hyung! – he stuttered, as always when he was nervous. Jaebeom’s face was full of his favorite drink, clothes soaked and sticky against his skin, but as he heard the kid’s quiet sobs, he couldn’t get himself to get angry at him.

\- Nothing happened, don’t worry. You didn’t mean it, at least, I hope so. – he forced out a reply and a smile as he cleaned up his face at least. He opened his eyes, facing with a big-eyed, pouting boy, and his smile became sincere.

\- O-o-of course I-I didn’t! – he faltered out, but still scared if Jaebeom will scream at him. His brothers were all quiet, because they count for an angry Jaebeom; but he couldn’t get angry, just looking at the younger guilty face, ready to cry made him calm down. No way in hell he wants to be the reason behind his tears.

\- Let me give you a hug, then! – Jaebeom got up from the floor, strawberry milk dripping from his clothes, hair gooey while sticking to his forehead, and smelling like a strawberry farm, but he just opens his arms, trying to get closer to the younger. The boy lets out a high-pitched scream, and tries to go for a run, but Jaebeom, for once, quicker than the small boy, and embraces him tightly, making the younger just as messy as he is. It was quite a sight for the brothers’ mother to witness when she arrived, and it wasn’t an easier task to tell her what happened, because by then, all the boys laughed together.

But it was hard to not to be the reason behind the brunet’s tears. The boy was a crybaby and would burst into tears over the smallest things. It was easier to accept if he was simply overwhelmed by his feelings, but still left Jaebeom defeated anytime he caused it. His brothers handled it way better than him, mostly laughing at the foreigner being a baby, teasing him and most of the times, it worked. He laughed through his sobs, and calmed down after a minute, but his tear-stained face was an ugly reminder to Jaebeom. And he hated it; he could deal with his brothers’ cries, can soothe them without a problem, so why can’t he do the same with the kid? Maybe because he isn’t his brother? He couldn’t answer to that question, no matter how many times he asked himself.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Any ideas who might be the one in Jaebeom's head (and heart)? Feel free to guess =)  
> The next chapter will reveal another character through a memory =)


	3. Chapter Two

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A little piece of Jaebeom's childhood and about a part of his family

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you'll like it and our next character is revealed! =)

Jaebeom was four and they still lived with his grandparents. His mom found a job in Seoul, only an hour away with public transport, and worked during the time Jaebeom was in the kindergarten. Sometimes, his granny picked him up, saying that his mother has to do overtime. Of course, they didn’t give an answer who brings her home at these nights with that nice car, which clearly wasn’t a form of public transport, because it was over his bedtime, and he should’ve been sleeping. And with that, the discussion was always ended.

That summer, Jaebeom came to know a man, name’s Suyoung. The man was kind, smiling brightly, and became a regular in Ilsan. His grandparents didn’t make a fuss about it, maybe they wanted his mother to be their child over their own son. Jaebeom will never ask them this, he is glad they took them in when they needed it and will never pry about the why’s and how’s. He doesn’t need to know.

In the end of that summer, they moved to Seoul and became a family. Their apartment was little, but Jaebeom loved it; it was home-y, had a great view to the city and nearby there was a huge playground. The man’s plan was to buy a property in the garden suburb, close to his sister’s home, but this plan was flushed down the toilet on a gloomy October night. Jaebeom, until that night and ever since then, never saw the man cry, even though they lived and still living under the same roof.

His sister and her husband died in an accident, near to the man’s apartment. The man was crushed, he just stood by the phone, tears streaming down his face, and Jaebeom remembers vividly the crestfallen face, as the usually broad-shouldered, proud man’s posture dropped, and couldn’t move from his spot. Jaebeom’s mother was downtown, so he felt like it was his task to help the man. He didn’t know what happened, didn’t heard a word, so he just grabbed the man’s hand, helped him to sit down on the couch, and embraced him as tight as a four-year-old can. He had an unclear idea how to cheer up someone, so he did what his mother did when he cried; he tried to sing a lullaby to the man.

It’s no surprise that his attempt wasn’t successful, but at least the man appreciated it, and just a little, but he calmed down. He still cried, couldn’t utter out a word, but his sobs weren’t that painful anymore. Jaebeom’s mother came home after what felt like hours but were merely ten minutes. And that’s when Jaebeom get to know the reason, and even though he doesn’t really grasp the mean behind the word “death”, he knows it must be painful, if the man’s state was anything to go by.

The following week was a blur, the man was on leave from his work, and most of the time, Jaebeom was with him, instead of being in the new kindergarten they found for him. They were in the hospital, at the police station, in a tall building with stuck-up-faced men in suits, talking about adult-things whereof Jaebeom had no idea.

The next momentum he remembers from that time was in a relatively cold room, he was sitting between his mother and the man, in front of them were an angry, old couple with a little boy, who was maybe in the same age as Jaebeom. The adults argued quite a lot, ‘til a man came into the room. He was in a suit, as all the adults in the room, but his suit was a bright color contrast to the others’ black ones, his face was neutral and Jaebeom didn’t liked the way he looked around the room. After what felt like forever, they all stood up, the man and his mother somewhat looked dumbfounded, while the elder couple was still angry, maybe more than before.

This is how their family got bigger, and before Jaebeom could even understand what happened, he shared a room with his _brother_ in the family’s tiny apartment. At first, it was awkward as the boy silently cried after his mother, but after a moment or two, Jaebeom offered his favorite toy to the boy, and invited him into his messily made fort. The boy was still silent, and stayed silent for weeks, but they grew extremely closer, and he was the only one his brother talked to. It took some time to the boy to grow closer to Jaebeom’s mother, or even to his own uncle, because it was a whole new scenario for him, and he couldn’t understand where is his mother, but after one and a half month, he opened up a little. It took more than a year to call them “mother” and “father”, and it wasn’t planned, it’s just slipped out, but since then, they are his parents. And since then, Jaebeom wasn’t afraid to call the man “father” either.

Later, long after they moved out from the tiny apartment they shared for a year, and got their own bedroom in their new home, they learned that the man’s sister and brother-in-law gave them everything they ever had in their will. This is why the elderly couple was so angry. They are the parents of the late Park Minjun, parents-in-law for Suyoung’s sister, grandparents of Jinyoung. And they never accepted their family, never accepted that Jinyoung has brothers, but they demanded Jinyoung’s presence at most of the holidays, at least a month of his summer vacation, and of course, at their birthdays. They only send gifts in the mail for the younger’s birthday, maybe give him a call once in a blue moon, but at least, they seemed like they are the best grandparents in this whole world in the eyes of their neighbors’.

The first nickname Jinyoung gave to Jaebeom was Mr. Old, because sometimes, Jaebeom became an old grandpa in the skin of a five-year-old, and all he wanted to do was napping, eating and probably napping a little more. It was boring for Jinyoung, and quite dangerous to his well-being, because of course he teased his brother about it, and in return, he got a noogie. He hated those.

The first nickname Jaebeom gave to Jinyoung was Little Fox, because the guy is a sneaky little… Yeah. They were in detention in Jinyoung’s room because, despite all the warnings, they jumped off from the terrace. It wasn’t that high, only three staircases, but being the clumsy five-year-old they were, they got hurt. Their mother almost had a heart attack, hearing them crying and seeing them all muddy-bloody. So, they were in the detention ‘til dinner, but they were already hungry… What could they do? Their mother was in the kitchen, and their father, most likely, helping her. Then Jinyoung, out of the blue, sneaked out of the room, and two minutes later, he came back with a handful of cookies, without being caught. And that’s an achievement for a barely five-year-old.

Since then, giving nicknames for each other was their thing. Years later, their brother joined them, and being the loud, little boy, he was, he got the best ones; Chatterbox, Munchkin and Beating Monster were the sticky ones, they still call him that. Jaebeom’s nickname, which stuck to him for dear life is Grumpy Boss, because he was bossy and grumpy most of the times, but still fun to be around, and later got the nickname Casanova from Jinyoung, because of all the girls (and boys) he dated. Or didn’t, only Jaebeom knows. It looked like Fox was the sticky one for Jinyoung, they still call him like that alongside with Brando (as in Marlon Brando). Even though they are teasing him about it, they know that he will be a great actor.


	4. Chapter Three

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, it's a really short chapter, sorry about that, but~ because of that, I'll post the next chapter now, too. Hope you'll like it and thanks for reading =)

Jaebeom couldn’t concentrate on the movie they were watching, so once again, he was focusing on his thoughts. Looking for reasons, when’s, how’s. He is five years younger than him. So how? He was away for almost a year with his parents. So, when? They talked during that time, the younger showed them their temporary apartment, sometimes gave them a tour in Hong Kong while they skyped. Sometimes it was just the two of them, talking about nonsenses or their thoughts, fears. Afterall, he was the first who comforted Jaebeom, who heard him cry when he felt down, who was _always_ there to listen to him despite their age difference.

Maybe this is the reason? Jaebeom wasn’t afraid to tell the younger everything he couldn’t tell his brothers. He wanted to be strong, as strong and reliable as their father, he wanted to be their big brother they can count on. It wasn’t his choice to rely on the younger like that anyway, it just happened. The younger quasi lived with them, his parents were away most of the time since the boy started school, and Jaebeom’s mother loved him as his own son. And since they only had four bedrooms, the boy had to sleep with one of them. At first, he slept in his youngest brother’s room, being his best friend and only a year away, it was the most logical choice. But their dearest Munchkin was a kicking monster while he was asleep; the younger somehow managed to survive the first night with only some bruises, but at least he was still in the bed. The second night he sneaked into the living room with the intent to sleep on the couch, but Jinyoung and Jaebeom was still awake, watching their favorite anime, so he got caught on. Jinyoung was only twelve, but just as sassy as always, so he claimed that he won’t share his bedroom, let alone his bed. And Jaebeom couldn’t let the boy sleeping on the couch, could he? To this day, they are still sharing a bedroom when the other is there. Not that Jaebeom minds it, it just gave the younger a chance to see his vulnerable side. Every time, he just asks once, and let Jaebeom decide to answer. To talk about himself, his insecurities, his feelings, anything. And Jaebeom knows that the younger is truly concerned, that he will listen to his ramblings.

But how could he act on the love he feels so strongly? The boy is just sixteen, and maybe not as innocent as Jaebeom wants to see him, but still much younger than him. To make things worse, they are friends, they are sharing a room and a bed occasionally. And Jaebeom shouldn’t look at him differently; he shouldn’t notice things. Not just in his appearance, but overall in anything. He failed to ignore the change in the younger’s voice, which became deeper, _sexier_ , he couldn’t overlook the fact that the brunet became talkative, playful and more confident in himself, and of course, his body matured too. And right now, sitting beside the boy, he shouldn’t think about his body.

\- You fell asleep, Beom Hyung? – the younger asks him, whispering, in case he indeed is asleep.

\- I can’t if you won’t let me. – Jaebeom huffs, acting like he can get annoyed by the boy. What a joke.

\- You said we will wait together to the others. Where are they, anyway? – there’s most probably a pout on the other’s face as he is poking Jaebeom’s side with his fingers, but Jaebeom can’t open his eyes. He can’t fall harder.

\- ‘Kay, I won’t sleep. – he gets it out grumpily, opening his eyes slowly, but still not looking at the other. – And I don’t know. I messaged Jinyoung, and he said they will be there in twenty. Why couldn’t you message them anyway? You had plenty of time for that since dawn. – he says as he intertwines their fingers, just to prevent more pokes from the younger. _Just because of that._

\- I… I just couldn’t, Hyung, leave me alone. – the brunet says breathily, and Jaebeom can see that he is blushing hard. _What the hell._

\- Now you have to tell me. – Jaebeom gets it out with relived curiosity, sitting up on the couch. – I won’t tease you about it, I promise.

\- I don’t want to tell you. – he says quietly, pouting again. Jaebeom wants to push it more, but his brothers have the most annoying timing, and he is sure that the younger will take advantage of the change in the situation and will run away from answering.

\- We are here to rescue you from Jaebeom hyung! – says Jinyoung, too loud and happy for Jaebeom’s liking.

\- How did you know I need help? – the younger’s giggling, hugging his friends. He didn’t hug Jaebeom, why didn’t he?

\- I need a hug too. - he says whining, opening his arms for a hug, and it would’ve been too perfect if he receives it from the brunet and not from his brother. Fuck them.

\- Jaebeom became an old, grumpy man recently. He couldn’t get laid lately, as it seems. He is all whiny and moody. You can sleep in my room tonight; I don’t want him to startle you with his teenager bitch phase.

\- Oh my god, Jinyoung, I hate you so much. – the oldest of them says, clearly annoyed, as he presses his head into a pillow.

\- Oh, Beom hyung, your little wee-wee won’t work? – as Jaebeom hears the brunet’s cooing, he just wants to be swallowed by the couch. He must’ve been a villain in his previous life to earn this out. – Need help handling it? – he feels a hand in his inner thigh, too close, too likable. Even through his jeans, he can feel the younger’s warm palm, the ever so light pressure on his leg just give a boost to his already dirty mind. _Just a little much closer, and oh my god…_ He slowly loses his hold of the pillow to shoot an angry glare at the younger, but god, his face is so close. – I’ll be in Chatterbox’s bedroom, Hyungs. – he says, giving Jaebeom a smack on the face, cheekily winking at him and leaving them behind with a giggle. _Deep breaths, Jaebeom, just don’t forget to inhale. And now exhale…_

\- You’re screwed, Hyung. What the hell happened just now? – says Jinyoung, voice higher than it’s usually. He must be surprised, and that’s a goal to achieve, so it wasn’t just Jaebeom’s imagination. His object of affection just teased him, and Jaebeom will explode if he can’t use the toilet within a minute.

\- If I only know… - he answers huskily and makes a beeline towards the bathroom. _Why him?_


	5. Chapter Four

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's time for add tags, yey! I hope you'll like the pairing, but it's slow burn (for real), and I'll only tag the end pairing.  
> Hope you'll like this chapter =)

Jaebeom celebrated his sixth birthday that day, and even though he got tons of toys and books, the best gift he got was only a few words. And to this day, he remembers clearly the joy on Jinyoung’s face, which most probably, mirrored his own.

The same year, a few days before Jinyoung’s sixth birthday, his mother gave birth to their little brother. They sat on the small hospital bed, between them was their mother, and in her arms, their little Munchkin, peacefully asleep.

Choi Youngjae was their sunshine in rainy days, always happy, cackling at everything, always there to cheer his brothers up. If he kissed the ground, he just laughed and continued his mindless running. He was loud, talkative, and friendly. Despite of their six-year age gap, they were best friends and shared a lot of happy moments together. Pranking their parents, their teachers, their mutual friends and each other, playing peek-a-boo ‘til dinner time, sneaking into each other’s room, and of course, the annoying “Mom said you have to take me with you, hyungs!”. And thanks to Youngjae’s friendly behavior, they befriended a shy, quiet foreigner.

Jaebeom couldn’t count the things he is thankful for if it comes to Youngjae. The younger was often his energy when he felt down, always talking to him, never leaving his side, not even when his bad temper got the worst out of him. Youngjae was never afraid of him, never flinched when Jaebeom threw things across the room, because he trusted his brother with his whole heart. He _knew_ Jaebeom would never hurt him.

Even the times when Jaebeom was truly angry, impulsive, and Youngjae was the reason behind it; the youngest _knew_ Jaebeom wants the best for him, wants to protect him from any harm, for God’s sake, protect him from the lightest breeze.

Youngjae became just as passionate about music as his oldest brother, became nearly as sassy as Jinyoung, but remained as cheerful and innocent as ever.

And Jaebeom would do anything to keep the smile on the other’s face. This is why Jaebeom agreed without hesitation when his father cornered him with a deal. If he gives up his dream as a musician, composer, producer, whatever you want to call it, and will became a business student at SNU, his brothers would get the chance to choose their own dream to pursue. He always had steady grades, always managed to get through the most dreadful curriculums. He did it for his brothers’ sake, so of course he get the best out of himself.

And only one knows about this beside himself and his father. The one who listened to his darkest thoughts, was his shoulder to cry on, never judging, never pushing too hard, who helped him to maintain the impossible. Even though Jaebeom loves his brothers, trusts them and they are his best friends, there are thoughts that he doesn’t want to share with them. There were times when he felt insecure, little and completely void inside; Mark Tuan helped him through these. He is still five years younger than him, but sometimes Jaebeom forgot about that; Mark always knew what to say, how to ease his mind. Mark was only thirteen when Jaebeom told him about the pledge he made, so he didn’t expect the mature response he got from the younger. From that on, Mark always was the first one he turns to if something got under his skin. He doesn’t want to lose that.

But there were things which annoyed Jaebeom to death about Mark. He is so secretive, even though they are his best friends. They never been in his home to begin with. Hell, they don’t even know where he lives. Somewhere near Bukhansan National Park, but that’s not helpful at all. They know he has multiple friends besides them, but they don’t know them. Some of them are really close to the boy, they know names, but they never had the chance to encounter. Which is odd, they know Mark for _years_. And they still don’t know what his parents are do for living. They travel a lot, but why? To where? Jaebeom’s parents probably have knowledge of that, because they nearly adopted their son, and as far as Jaebeom knows, their fathers are friends since university.

* * *

The first day of school was always agonizing, at least to Jaebeom. Jinyoung, of course, was excited and being the goody-two-shoes that he still is, he awaited it impatiently throughout the summer. They counted the days they have left from the summer for two different reasons, but that year their youngest brother became old enough to go to school with them and he was so excited that Jaebeom didn’t had the heart to tone down his brother’s excitement about school.

The last bell was the sweetest melody Jaebeom heard that day, so he darted out of the classroom, straight ahead to the school gates, where he is supposed to meet his brothers. As soon as he stepped out, he breaths in the fresh air, as if he just escaped from jail after long years. He glanced around, looking for his brothers, and he soon finds his youngest but loudest near the gates, sitting on a bench with a kid. His brother talked animatedly while the other just listened to him with a small smile, swinging his legs. As he walked closer, he recognizes the kid as the son of their father’s friend who recently moved to Korea with half of his family. They met a few weeks ago, the kid struggling with the language was very obvious, so Jaebeom was really surprised to see him at school.

\- Hyung! – his brother finally catched a sight of him, waving excitedly at his way. – Look who I found! – he says smiling, wiggling on his seat next to the kid while pointing at him. The kid just slapped his hand away, but the little smile never leaves his face. – He couldn’t come over to play with me because he learned Korean, so he can start this year!

\- You are being too loud again, Chatterbox – Jaebeom patted his brother’s head lovingly. – It looks like we have another brain in our team from now on – said Jaebeom after a moment of hesitation, but the widening smile on the kid’s face made it worth the unsaid promise of being friends.

The next day was mostly uneventful, although torturous; they already had classes, and none of his teachers cared about the good weather. They had a surprise test in math, and bunch of homework both in math and English. Their math teacher probably woke up on the wrong side of the bed. Their mother was supposed to get Youngjae that day, since he had way less classes than his brothers, so Jaebeom wasn’t in a hurry to go to the gates, but he was quite surprised when he saw his brothers, his mother and the kid sitting on the same bench as the day before.

\- Mom? What are you still doing here? – He asked as he stepped closer to them, giving his brothers a smile.

\- Dorine is running late, so we decided to wait with Mark today – she says casually turning a page in her book, and Jaebeom concludes Dorine is Mark’s mother he met briefly.

\- But she will be here soon, you really don’t have to… - the kid blushes hard as he mumbles this out, but his mother doesn’t hear him. But Jaebeom is astonished; the little kid indeed learned Korean really well. He has a faint accent, but who cares? He only knew the very basic things in Korean a month ago.

\- You’re seven, right? – Jinyoung looks at the kid from his spot, sitting in front of the bench. Jaebeom decides to join him in the grass; it’s actually more comfortable than the chairs in their classrooms.

\- Y-yeah – the kid nods shyly, not looking at anyone, probably trying to count the blades of grass around them.

\- You’re five years younger than me, and already speak two languages. I’m giving back my genius classification – Jinyoung says with a wide smile of his, eyes crescent and adorable. Jaebeom only notices now that the kid probably cried before, his eyes a little red and still glistening with tears. – Don’t be concerned with those kids. They are just idiots who can’t imagine what it is like to have a brain.

\- Jinyoung-ah! – their mother finally looks up from her book.

\- But they bullied him just because he isn’t Korean, and because he can use what’s inside his head! It’s not fair. He is younger than them – why they bully someone half their sizes? – Jinyoung was fuming, and for a twelve-year-old boy, he really looked like a worried mother. Jaebeom was silently smiling at this thought.

Dorine wasn’t there that soon, they waited hours for her, talking, doing their homework, and eating. Luckily, Mark had a snack-bag with him, full of with sweets, crackers and sodas. Mark’s mother was clearly stressed when she arrived, almost crying, apologizing million times per minute.

\- Thank you, Soonbok, for looking after him! I just couldn’t leave earlier…

\- No worries, Dorine. If anything, I would love to look out for him at the afternoons, so you don’t have to worry about him. You can pick him up once you finished with work. – Jaebeom’s mother smiled at the older woman, and Jaebeom knew; his mother was already whipped for Mark. And it wasn’t just his mother, because Youngjae looked like an excited puppy around the foreigner, and Jinyoung was obviously impressed by the younger’s skills. Jaebeom was gone, too, the younger’s relaxing aura lured him, and despite of being younger than him, Mark was quite helpful with Jaebeom’s homework.

\- You wouldn’t mind? Y-you sure, Soonbok? He can be quite a handful if he overcomes his shyness… - said Dorine, looking at his son with a look, and judging by Mark’s cheeky smile, he really wasn’t that shy.

\- Jaebeom and Jinyoung were troublemakers too…

\- Mom! I was not! It was all Jaebeom! – Jinyoung gasps in shock at the sudden betrayal, but Jaebeom’s face is neither better.

\- Yah, you punk! I’m older than you! – screams Jaebeom, giving a noogie to the younger.

\- Okay! Then it was all Jaebeom _hyung_! – yelled Jinyoung while tried to shake off Jaebeom knuckles. – Better?

\- I wasn’t the one who stole those cookies, excuse _you_ , Jinyoung-ah! And it wasn’t my idea to wash our clothes! – and with that, they start to bicker with each other, making Youngjae and Mark laugh in the process.


	6. Chapter Five

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, so sorry for the late updates and short chapters!  
> I'll try to update sooner, and until that, I hope you'll like this chapter =)

True to his words, Jinyoung let the younger sleep in his room, much to Jaebeom’s displeasure. Of course, Mark could’ve declined the offer, but this was a first from Jinyoung, and besides, why would he want to sleep with Jaebeom? Which annoyed Jaebeom more was the morning after with Jinyoung’s knowing smirk, Mark’s sleepy, but smiling face which was still perfect in Jaebeom’s eyes, and the fact that they seemed to be in the same wavelength more than before.

\- We just talked through the night, hyung, I don’t even know why I refused to share my room with Markeu before. – Jinyoung singsongs, an unbearable shit-eating grin is obvious on the younger’s face.

\- But soon I have to sleep, it’s my third day without any of it. – Mark whines, his usually deep voice almost unrecognizable, tiredness is evident in his state.

\- You had a gaming night before? – Jaebeom asks casually, and steps closer to engulf the smaller boy in a hug. _He fits perfectly._ But before Mark could answer, a sleepy Youngjae appears and fling himself down to the barstool.

\- I’m hungry. – he complains, eyelids half closed, but voice already loud enough to wake the whole neighborhood up.

\- I will die, Youngjae-ah, keep your voice down, please. – Mark snarls at Youngjae, trying to hide his face in Jaebeom’s chest, so his voice is muffled a little. In response, Jaebeom just hugs him tighter, while Jinyoung just raise his eyebrow up smugly at the scene. Fuck his “I-know-it-all” face.

\- If you die, it will be because Jaebeom hyung stinks. Get a shower, Smelly Cat. – Jinyoung chimes in, still grinning like the asshole he is. Jaebeom sometimes wonders why they are best friends to begin with. Youngjae just laughs at his hyungs, and Jaebeom can’t see Mark’s face, but he is sure that the younger has a smile on his face, too.

\- I hate you, Jinyoung-ah. So fucking much. – and because Jaebeom is as lucky as a man can be, his mother heard the last sentence, but not Jinyoung’s.

\- Im Jaebeom, be nice to your brother! – she says accompanying with a smack on his nape. – And don’t swear under this roof! – and with that, Jaebeom’s nape get the chance to suffer from another smack. What a beautiful morning.

\- But Jinyoung was mean to me! – he says while pouting, still hugging Mark. Mark isn’t complaining, so why in the hell would he let him go? Maybe he fell asleep?

\- I didn’t said anything, Jaebeom hyung. – the boy says with big eyes, faking his innocence.

\- He didn’t say anything to Jaebeom hyung, mom. – Youngjae is chiming in, probably because Jinyoung will do his breakfast. He isn’t enthralled by the idea of poisoned pancakes.

\- He said that Jaebeom stinks, and he will kill me with his stench, and called him Smelly Cat. – Mark is listing through the insults, and both brothers are surprised; Mark never chimes in like that in their brotherly quarrels. – But I’m sleepy, so Jaebeom, please, put your ass down, and lemme sleep on you. And stop bickering, my brain will blow up. – and with that, instead of leaning against the counter, Jaebeom picks Mark up easily, and sits down next to Youngjae.

\- You won’t eat breakfast either? – Jaebeom asks quietly.

\- Shut up, hyung.

\- Jaebeom hyung will whip your ass, Mark. – Youngjae whisper-yells at his best friend, but as he panickily looks at his brother, he finds him completely calm, content even. _Why the hell Jaebeom hyung isn’t raging? That was totally rude coming from a younger._

\- Pfft, henpecked. – Jinyoung snorts, but the bastard’s luck that Jaebeom has Mark in his lap right now, already half-asleep, and only Jaebeom heard him. He would raise hell if the younger just outing him like that in front of everyone. It’s bad enough that Jinyoung noticed his _slight_ crush on Mark.

Mark is a very light sleeper, Jaebeom knew that since they are sharing a room sometimes. Or most of the time. So instead of walking back to his room, he tried very hard to reach the couch without waking the younger up while he is deep in his thoughts once again. He already has a beautiful friendship with the other, why his heart wants more? As he looks down at the peaceful boy in his arms, he already has his answer. It’s just feels right, despite everything against it. Maybe he should talk to Jinyoung.

Speaking of the devil, Jinyoung settles down beside him, with two mugs of coffee.

\- Oh, thanks, Jinyoung-ah. – he reaches for it, and the first sip warms his inside, waking him up from his thoughts.

\- Sorry for calling you Smelly Cat. I just teased you. – the younger says apologetically.

\- Sorry for saying that I hate you. Sometimes I do, don’t get me wrong, but you’re still my brother. – Jaebeom admits quietly, hoping that Mark wouldn’t wake up. Jinyoung silently laughs, shaking his head in disbelief, then his gaze finds Mark’s relaxed face, and for a moment, his eyes lingers, taking in every detail the younger’s face provide. He glances up on Jaebeom slowly, and he knows the question the younger wants to ask.

\- I won’t tell him. I won’t act upon my feelings and fuck everything up, maybe even literally.

\- Maybe he feels the same? Nothing can ruin a 9-year-old friendship, hyung. Nothing like this. If it can, it wasn’t a real friendship in the first place.

\- I don’t want to test it if it is a real friendship or not. I want to keep it. You know I screw up my romantic relationships all the time. – Jaebeom mutters quietly, but Jinyoung hears him.

\- Because they never want to know you. They were never interested in more than the cool façade you have. They just want the good lay you offer, and they run away as soon as you need more than that. It’s not your fault, you just couldn’t find the right one yet. He saw everything about you already, so he knows what to expect. Maybe he is – nodding his head toward Mark. – the right one.

\- Yeah, he can’t be the chosen one, that title belongs to Harry Potter. – Jinyoung just rolls his eyes in annoyance, but Jaebeom can’t talk about his feelings right now. Mark could hear them.

When Mark wakes up, he seems cutely lost, but much more rested than he was in the morning. It was a 3-hour long nap, after all. Jaebeom’s back hating on him so much, but he couldn’t care when he sees that breathtaking smile.

\- Sorry, I fell asleep on you. I was just joking but seems like I really was tired. – he says groggily and snuggles closer to Jaebeom. – Sorry Beom hyung.

\- Don’t be sorry, just don’t do this, because it can fuck up your system.

\- Okay daddy. I will be a good boy for you. – Mark hums as he gives a peck to Jaebeom on the neck, positioning himself to sit perfectly on the growing bulge in his pants. All of that because of a sentence and purely by the younger’s presence. – Don’t spank me, please. – he says cheekily, lips still on Jaebeom’s neck, close to his ears.

\- Mark? What the hell? – Jaebeom gets it out huskily, eyes two sizes bigger than normally, and by now, he surely knows it’s not his only organ growing sizes.

\- Sorry, Beom hyung. I just love teasing you. – he giggles. – But it seems like your pee-pee is perfectly working. Was it the nickname, Daddy? Or the kisses? – he asks, peppering Jaebeom’s jawline with little pecks. – Or you imagining spanking me? You have to take notes, I just roaring up the engines, so you can get laid, hyung! So? – Mark hums, lips still ghosting his neck, one hand finding his way to the hem of his shirt, and Jaebeom has to take deep breaths. This shouldn’t happen.

\- You don’t want to do this, Mark. – Jaebeom says, almost choking on his own saliva while he grabs the younger’s wrist. – Don’t start something you don’t want to finish. – he whispers, gaze intense as he looks deeply into the younger’s soft brown ones.

\- Who said I didn’t want to finish this, Beom Hyung? – Mark holds his gaze, softly whispering. – But if you don’t need my help… - he sighs, giving a last kiss on Jaebeom’s cheeks, and leaving him alone with his _little_ problem. Again. But now, Jaebeom is more confused than ever.


	7. Chapter Six

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here is the next chapter, I hope you'll enjoy it!

Mark was almost seven when his parents decided they will move to the other side of the World. And of course, his sisters were old enough to stay back, because of university, because of a boyfriend, or just because they had a choice.

His parents wanted to widen their business, and since they had a stable market in the states already, they chose Asia as their new headquarter. The first few months were hard, Mark spent his whole summer trying to learn a new language, while his parents were working day to night, sometimes night to day. From mid-June to the first week of August, he was with two of his neighbors and their sons. Much to his relief, the boys were only a few years older than him, and both of them knew English and helped him with his Korean.

Mark’s summer was saved by Park Jaehyung and Kang Younghyun, the two boy who immediately took him in, sometimes babied him, and befriended him without a question. In order to start his first year in a Korean school, he had to take a test, and for that, he had to have a stable Korean knowledge. And that was hard for a seven-year-old, but Mark did everything in his will, and to this day, he is grateful that Jaehyung and Younghyun instead of spending their summer vacation with playing around, they helped him. He wanted so badly to go to the same school as them, but his parents were adamant about enrolling him in a “normal” school, and since both boys studied in a private school, his hopes were flushed down the toilet.

But later, he changed his mind; he couldn’t have been luckier. At the beginning of August, they had a family dinner with his father’s old friend and his family. Two of the man’s sons were older, almost the same age as Younghyun, and one was a year younger than Mark. He didn’t even have to try; the younger boy was talkative, and they got along quite well. Even though they didn’t meet for the rest of the summer, they met the first day of school. His father chose this school because of his friend’s recommendation.

With Youngjae’s unconditional love, he scored himself a second family. Of course, he had Younghyun and Jae still, but their family were never this welcoming toward him, and even though he spent the summer with their sons, they were mostly in Mark’s home, ordering take-outs (thanks to Jae). And letting two 13-year-old boys babysitting a 7-year-old without even asking them where they are, spoke volumes. Mark’s parents, at least, called them every day, almost every hour to check up on them, sometimes send them lunch, always giving them enough money to buy food, occasionally bringing them to the office. That summer, he only met twice the others’ parents, and none of them were pleasant. To make things worse, both Jae’s and Younghyun’s mothers are housewives, while his mother worked hard alongside with this father to build their own wealth.

After his second day of school, he spent most of his time with the Choi’s. His parents picked him up at late night and dropped him off at school early in the morning, usually an hour before his first class. After school, he went to his second home, mostly with Youngjae and his brothers, they did their homework and played games or anything, the only thing they needed was the other three. It went like that for a year. But his parents extended their business, again; although now, they chose to travel instead of moving again. Mark was secretly grateful for that; it was hard enough to part with his sisters and best friend, he didn’t want to part with his new friends, too. He grew to love them fondly, always looking for their company. With his parents new working schedule, he found himself partially moving in to the Choi’s home. Sometimes, when he thought he is too much for the family, he lied about his parents being home, and invited Younghyun and Jae over, so he wouldn’t be alone. Only Jae and Younghyun knew about it, of course, and they were more than happy to get out of their suffocating homes. He was thankful that despite his parents’ absence, he had a good relationship with them, and only felt the urge to run away from them once.

* * *

In his lifetime, he only felt truly fury twice; the first, when they moved to Seoul without asking him. He was only seven, so he couldn’t do anything, not even scream at his parents in annoyance. He went to his oldest sister’s room and weep himself to sleep in his sister’s embrace. The second time was a year ago, and by then, he was a fifteen-year-old teenage boy, full of hormones and unstable emotions; he never ever raised his voice towards his parents, but that day, he let out all his frustration. That day, his parents decided that they will move to Hong Kong for a year because of a project. After arguing back and forth for an hour, he turned his back from them and walked away without a word; he is not proud of it, but he couldn’t stay there. But he didn’t wander far, he went to a nearby playground, and called the only person he knew with serious parents-issues; Younghyun. Jae had interesting parents, too, but at least his parents didn’t control every aspect of his life and his mother actually cared for him on her own interesting way. On the other hand, Younghyun had the worst set of parents; an ignorant mother and a control-maniac, abusive father. That year was his fourth semester at Harvard, and even though Younghyun liked law, and is a genius, he wanted to stay in Korea. But he never had the choice.

So they met at the playground, and for the first time in his whole life, he complained about his parents. Younghyun was full of with his own problems, that was only his second day back in Seoul, but listened to him without protesting. That night, they got off to Sokcho for a weekend, only bringing themselves and what they had with them. Younghyun insisted that Mark must call his parents, because unlike Younghyun’s, they were probably worried to death. Saturday, they explored the city, because the beach wasn’t open yet, so Younghyun had to promise to visit Mark in Hong Kong and have a beach-day together. Not that the older boy was against it. At Sunday, they had a lazy day, ordering take outs and just watching movies, until it was late enough to head home. Mark wanted to tell his best friends goodbye, and he had a feeling that Youngjae and Jaebeom wouldn’t let him go that easily. Jinyoung, on the other hand, would be a total mom, making him promise to call them daily, to eat properly, and hugging him tightly while he says, ‘I won’t even miss you, don’t be a crybaby’. Jae was in the states, so he will visit him alongside with Younghyun.

The only good thing about this temporary move is that he will have the chance to spend some time with his childhood best friend, Jackson. He lived in the neighborhood where Mark lived his first seven year, and they were really close to each other. They had their own language together, and after his parents decided to move to Seoul, the Wangs soon moved back to Hong Kong. Since then, they mostly spent their summer vacations together in Los Angeles.

Even though he spent his last year in Hong Kong, his best friends contacted him regularly, he was invited to Brian’s diploma ceremony in Boston alongside with Jae. They counted on the invitation, since Brian was adamant about ignoring his parents because of an argument they had earlier that year.

His favorite noona, Hyejin also called him at least three times a week, even visited him in December, and spent her New Year’s Eve with Mark, celebrating and exploring the city. Hyejin lives in the same neighborhood as him (alongside with Brian and Jae), so he knew her ever since they moved there. They are each other’s number one cheerleader, always hyping the other up, the other’s secret keepers. They weren’t best friends; they were siblings by heart and choice. And it wasn’t just the four of them; their neighborhood was full of chaebols, and with the normal ones, they formed a friendly group. They broke the stereotypes for rich kids, because none of them were snobby, a show-off or a dumb brat. They were always there for each other. He was grateful for the friendship they had.

Fifteen chaebol kids in a group chat can be chaotic, but its anchored Mark when he felt alone in Hong Kong. He counted back the days, even though he was with Jackson, it wasn’t the same, because most of the times, Jackson was away. He missed Youngjae and his brothers, as in his second family, his favorite noonas and hyungs (mostly Hyejin, Brian and Jae though), and he missed the only younger from their large group, too.

They named their group chat ‘Brats’, just because the fun of it. The messages were countless, the group was always active, mostly because of Jae’s ramblings (it seems like he always has deep thoughts to share), Minhyuk’s and Wonpil’s wanderings (“What if they could clone us? I would order five of me!”, messaged Minhyuk one night, but fortunately, Hyunwoo answered him before anyone else with a simple “Even one Minhyuk is too much” and Minhyuk dropped this topic.) and general sitreps for those who are abroad. Pictures from missed parties, business dinners, concerts or just casual hangouts with everyone around. Brian and Mark wanted nothing more to be with them at these hangouts.


	8. Chapter Seven

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the late update, again, I'll try to update more frequently during exam season, but I hope you'll enjoy this chapter anyway, and thanks for reading =)

Since Mark came back from Hong Kong, he was mostly with Brian, since they both had so much to make up, because they didn’t talk too much in the last months. They met with the others, too, the group held a ‘welcome home’ party for the two, he had a bunch of gaming nights with Jae, a handful of a shopping day with Hyejin and of course, he was with his family. As in the Chois, his parents, even though they didn’t travel, they were in the office all day. At first, he was afraid, because he didn’t saw the brothers for a year, but they welcomed him with arms wide open, smiling, and curiosity about his year without them.

And he doesn’t know why, but he found himself especially clingy with Jinyoung and Jaebeom. He never was this type of person; he was more than good to be on his own; he just couldn’t stay at home without his parents. It wasn’t because of the lack of interacts, rather the discomfort of an always empty house. His parents lasted two weeks without travelling, so he was back with the Chois after a long night with Brian. With Youngjae, he always felt at ease, he never felt the need to prove himself, but with Jinyoung and Jaebeom, he always felt himself a little and dummy kid who doesn’t know a thing about his surroundings. It wasn’t their fault; it was his insatiable compulsion to conform. But now, he actually saw himself realistic. With Brian being back from the states (he won’t continue with postgraduate studies for now, much to his parents’ displeasure), his self-confidence arose, his confused state of mind stalled for a minute. They talked through nights, and Brian never saw him as something he wasn’t. He was always straightforward and almost never left questions unanswered, Mark didn’t have to read between the lines with him. So he believed when the older said that he has nothing to worry about; so he eased his inner tension, and became himself around Jinyoung and Jaebeom, again. Maybe that’s why he had an all-nighter with Jinyoung, talking about anything and everything, without a fog of filter on his brain (but his sleep-deprived self could’ve played a major part in that, too), and maybe, _maybe_ this led him to tease Jaebeom to death. They were always close to each other, always listening when the other needed it, always lend a shoulder to the other to catch themselves, but Mark _never_ had the courage to rile Jaebeom up. The older boy was a short-fuse, hot-tempered, impulsive, whatever you called it, so it was a dangerous game to play. If Jaebeom snaps, and you’re on the receiving end, you should start to prepare for your own funeral. He looked at the red finger marks on his wrist, and knew he went too far with him this time. He should apologize later, and he must quit this game before he hurts someone or himself.

\- Mark hyung? What are you looking at? We’re gonna lose! – Youngjae’s loud voice broke his train of thoughts, and he focused again on the game they played. They indeed almost lost, but Mark wasn’t a loser. He quickly summed up their situation, their equipment, and led them to a sweet win. On the other end of the line, their third groupmate cheered loudly. HH

\- Yah, Mark, get your shit together, we almost lost! – Jae snapped after his cheers died down.

\- Almost doesn’t count. Maybe you should learn how to play, so you wouldn’t need to rely on me that much. _Hyung._ – Mark laughed, because he never called Jae hyung, even though the boy is older by six years. They didn’t care about formalities between themselves.

\- I hope you see telepathically my middle finger, you brat. – Jae says without a bite, laughing again. – See you tomorrow, dummy. – and with that, he logs out, so the youngers switch off their console too.

\- It’s funny how you never call him Hyung unless you want to tease him. And how I don’t know him outside of gaming. I mean, we both knew you since forever. – Youngjae ranted while they made their way to the kitchen. They played Halo for hours, and their empty stomachs grumbled painfully already. – Do you even call anyone hyung beside my brothers?

\- Oh, yeah. Hyunwoo hyung, for example. Oh, or Sungjin hyung! He is hella scary. – Mark says absentmindedly as they reach the kitchen. Jinyoung and Jaebeom is there, talking quietly, putting their heads together. As soon as they heard the youngers came in, they abruptly stopped their discussion, like nothing happened. Mark never was a too curious type, so he just frowned at the scene, sitting down next to Jinyoung.

\- Planning to kill us both and bury our bodies in the garden, Hyungs? – Youngjae asks curiously, already searching for something to eat in the fridge. – Mark can take you two out if you upset him, so plan carefully. – he says distractedly, while trying to decide which yogurt to eat. Mark just smiles at him, resting his head on Jinyoung’s shoulder, checking his phone. He is looking through the messages he received from the group chat, when he gets a new message, this time from Jackson. He sent a selfie, grinning widely with LA in the background. Mark won’t lie, even though it was his choice to stay in Seoul for this summer, he missed his sisters and the hot summer of California.

\- Oh, is that Jackson? – Jinyoung asks curiously, looking at the screen. Mark reacts to the photo with a heart and nods his head. – You two are dating? – he asks again, probably because of the heart.

\- Not anymore. We are better as friends. – Mark answers bluntly as he replies back to his other messages.

\- You two dated? – Youngjae asks incredulously. – And you’re still friends?! What the heck, Mark hyung?

\- I mean, we’re friends for as long as I can remember, and we dated for how long? Two or three months? Why would we throw our friendship away? It just couldn’t work out for us, we broke up without hard feelings, any argument or white lies. – Mark furrows his eyebrows; he can’t understand why it is so unbelievable. 

\- But. You shared your bed with him! – Youngjae stutters, clearly in disbelief.

\- Youngjae, he is my friend. One of my best friends at that. I won’t throw my friends away without a reason. – Mark huffs already annoyed by this topic. With Jackson, they just didn’t hit it off. They were both curious, trying things out, but at the end, they didn’t feel anything more than platonic love for each other. They were honest with each other through it all, never led on the other, never lied to themselves either. They both knew it was a dead end and accepted it.

\- Why, it’s not a reason? – but Youngjae was still adamant. Mark just sighs, hugging Jinyoung again, closing his eyes. He won’t explain himself any further. With his eyes closed, he couldn’t see the meaningful look Jinyoung gave Jaebeom, or Jaebeom’s surprised, but smiley face. – Mark, answer me!

\- No, it’s not a reason. We’re friends, Youngjae, we work out perfectly as friends, but not as lovers. We accepted it and moved on, remaining as best friends. I can’t, and I won’t explain it more.

\- But…

\- Youngjae, drop it already. – and with that, Youngjae huffily leaves the kitchen, mumbling to himself something about whores and faintly, Mark heard him saying Jaebeom’s name, but he wasn’t sure. With shaky hands, he unlocks his phone, and send a message to the group chat, asking for a ride. He thought Youngjae will understand him, or at least won’t be this harsh. He failed to see what’s wrong with this situation, and although he kind of understands Youngjae’s point of view, it’s still not valid.

\- Hey, I think you’re right. About Jackson and you. You two are friends and both mature enough to carry on your friendship. It’s respectable, because you’re both young and impulsive, so… I understand where you are coming from. – says Jinyoung quietly, and Mark sees Jaebeom nodding his head too. Mark smiles thankfully at them.

\- I thought that it will work out, you know? They say that best friends make the best couples, and everyone thought that we were together already, so we gave it a shot. But nothing changed, except some kisses here and there, and… Yeah, you probably know. – Jaebeom choked on his strawberry milk, coughing hard, and Mark became beet red. – Thanks for listening to me. It’s better if I go home. – he says as he looks at his phone again, checking their group chat. Three of his friends offered him a ride, and after that, they argued about who will pick him up. He smiled at their antics, and the way they cared about him. Johnny and Jae were voted down by Hyunwoo, because the older was closer to Mark and stated that Johnny can’t pick Mark up with a motorbike, because they need their fake maknae alive.

\- I can give you a ride, if you want to. – Jaebeom said after he regained himself, cheeks still red because of his coughing fit. And maybe because imagining Mark inappropriately, but Mark doesn’t have to know that.

\- Don’t worry about me, Beom hyung. – Mark smiles at him. – And… I'm sorry about earlier.

\- I’ll worry about you ‘til I die, Markeu. – Jaebeom sighs after Mark left the house. Jinyoung just pats his back, but they soon find themselves looking out on the windows. A new Nissan GT-R pulls up in front of their home, and for a moment, both boy frowns, because no way in hell that any of their neighbors could afford this car without selling their souls to Satan. And as the driver get out of the car, they couldn’t recognize him, the guy is not even familiar to them. Thanks to the opened windows, they can hear immediately why.

\- Hyung! I’m one hundred percent sure this wasn’t your car last time I checked. – they hear Mark’s cheery voice. Jaebeom stiffens, waiting for anything more; he craves to know more about Mark. Or hear his voice more. And for his utmost joy, after a second, he can see Mark’s rather tiny frame walking closer to the guy. If Mark looks small next to Jaebeom, he definitely looks delicate compared to that man. _Don’t be jealous, Jaebeom, don’t be. Take a pull on yourself!_

\- Yeah, I got it for my birthday, I just fetched her from the store. – the guy smiles, making his previously cold face warm in a snap of a finger. How does Mark know people like him? Just his suit looks like it costs more than their entire tuition.

\- Ooh, does that mean I will be the very first one to ride shotgun? – Mark asks excitedly, and Jaebeom can’t help himself, but smile at the younger. _He is too precious._

\- But don’t tell Minhyuk. He will chop my balls off if he isn’t the first mitfahrer in my car. – and besides the serious tone, the guy is still full on grinning.

\- Oh then, obviously, I will send a picture to him. – Mark’s cheeky tone gives away his probably mischievous smirk that Jaebeom loves so much. – Let’s go, Hyung, I can surprise Brian if we hurry up! – they can hear lastly, as Mark hops in the car, and the guy follows him, laughing. Not even a minute after, the engines purrs, and as smoothly as it arrived, it pulls out from their driveway, now with Mark inside. But Jaebeom’s head spinning with thousands of miles per second, because _Brian? Who is Brian and exactly when did he get in the picture? Why Mark wants to surprise him? And who was this guy? What he has to do with Mark?_

\- Who the hell is Brian? – Jaebeom bursts it out, still looking at the streets in front of the house, as if the answer would be in the dustbin outside.

\- Your guess is as good as mine, Hyung. Maybe Youngjae knows?

With that, they are heading upstairs to the younger’s room, and as they slowly peeking inside, they can see their brother’s almost crying face.

\- Mark went home, right? – he asks quietly.

\- Probably not home, but he left. – Jaebeom says grumpily, but Jinyoung shuts him with a stern gaze, so he wouldn’t continue.

\- I just… He always said that his friendships are important to him… - he starts meekly, voice barely audible. – Jackson is one of his best friends, and he almost shattered it just because of some fling… It isn’t like Mark…

\- Things like this can happen, Youngjae-ah. But they remained best friends, you heard that… - Jaebeom says, but he is got cut off by the younger.

\- Of course, you would say that, Hyung! You never stayed in a relationship, never were serious about any of them. You never befriended them, none of them meant anything to you! – Youngjae yells, surprising both his brothers. – Of course, Jaebeom hyung approves this fling, because he can’t understand what the other could’ve lose!

\- Youngjae-ah, it’s enough, I think… - Jinyoung says calmly as he sees how deeply this hurts their brother. – You should’ve seen only Mark in this situation, and not draw any inference.

\- Of course you’re siding with him… Even though he had more girls and boys over the last year than one should have in a lifetime! Even when we met a new face every other day! Why do you pretend that it’s normal? Please, don’t taint Mark with your philosophy, _Hyung._ – he says angrily, and with that, he slams the door in their face. Jinyoung is fuming, ready to go at it again, but Jaebeom just walks away, towards his own room, and he is too, slamming his door shut, and locks it just to be sure that no one bothers him. And for the first time after weeks, his mind is completely void of messy thoughts, heart’s heavy but differently from before, and even though he puts on his headphones, playing his favorite songs, he feels empty. _So I didn’t even have to make a move on Mark, I still became the monster._

**Author's Note:**

> There will be several perspectives and timelines, but I'll try to be clear about them. And I changed most of the characters' age and with that, their age difference, but it will be out in later chapters or end notes.  
> Hope you will enjoy it!
> 
> Warning: the main relationship will be M/M. And hella slow burn.


End file.
